Playoffs, Week 2: The Check Swing

If I had asked you to name FBLG's leading scorer for the past 2 weeks, how many guesses would you have needed before you got to Tyler Naquin?

"x" indicates a team that advanced in the playoff bracket

The success of Wade Miley (left) is baffling to us. On the field, too.

1. Tears In Nevin (Rich/Brian, 3925.83 points, last week 1): At first glance, it appears the commissioners got eliminated because they finally paid the price for the loss of Clayton Kershaw, Trevor Rogers and Pablo Lopez. But the pitching was actually pretty good -- despite the Mets not needing a closer because winning isn't an NL East kind of thing and the Braves yanking Touki Toussaint from the rotation after he won 2 games in a week. Sandy Alcantara and Sonny Gray tried their best, though. Still, we're not sure what the problem is with David Price pitching more than 4 innings. The offense was a let-down, too, with only Freddie Freeman (51.5 points) having what you would call a good 2-week stretch. The second-leading hitter was Corey Seager (27.5 points), and that's way too big a gap.

2. x-Sunshine Carpet Cleaners (Jack, 3797.83 points, last week 2): We'd call Jack's pitching staff the "big 4," but we just can't accept that Wade freaking Miley is one of the best pitchers in the NL this season. Still, Miley plus Max Scherzer, Walker Buehler and Josh Hader did a great job of helping SCC knock off TIN -- those 4 combined to go 8-0 with 4 saves. The Colorado offense came alive, and that's why C.J. Cron and Charlie Blackmon were SCC's top hitters. The Blake Street Bombers (throwback nickname!) combined for 8 homers, 23 RBIs and 18 runs. It was such a good week for Jack that Fernando Tatis Jr. (only 22 points) was outscored by Avisail Garcia, J.T. Realmuto, Kolten Wong and the aforementioned Colorado duo.

Hey, Mookie. Maybe it's time to focus on baseball, OK?

3. x-Lumber Co Lumber (John, 3730 points, last week 3): Paul Goldschmidt climbed into the wayback machine and looked like the Goldy of 2015, homering 3 times and scoring 50 points. Riding shotgun was Juan Soto, who also homered 3 times and scored 40 points. Bryan Reynolds, Jake Cronenworth and Ke'Bryan Hayes also performed well in the first round as LCL defeated The Rookies to advance. As usual, Aaron Nola and Joe Musgrove anchored the rotation, combining for 65 points despite only picking up 1 win between them. Taylor Widener actually looked competent, and Vladimir Gutierrez and JT Brubaker contributed with puntos despite allowing more runs than you'd like.

4. x-The Misfits (Reid, 3709.33 points, last week 5): Reid's team clobbered PM by 100 points in advancing to the second round. Speaking of turning back the clock, Adam Wainwright threw it all the way back to the last time he hit 90 mph on the radar gun -- he scored 44 points while going 2-1 and allowing 2 runs in 21 innings. Kenley Jansen earned 6 saves and allowed only 1 run. Sure, Kyle Hendricks was kind of a mess, but so it goes for the 2021 Cubs. The offense was strong and consistent; Kris Bryant homered 5 times and Josh Bell hit 4. They weren't the top scorers, though; that honor goes to Notre Dame legend A.J. Pollock (35.5 points), followed closely by former Angels legend Jean Segura (34 points). Even scrubby Rafael Ortega scored 20.5 points in place of oft-injured semi-pro bowler Mookie Betts.

Like a knife through hot butter.

5. Boogie Oogie Penny Ponies (Matt, 3657.34 points, last week 4): The Bucs' offense went berserk in the first-round matchup with BOPP, sending Matt's team to the consolation bracket. Logan Webb (48.33 points) did his best to lead this team to victory with 3 outstanding starts, but Mark Melancon didn't even have a save opportunity and Freddy Peralta got hurt. Luis Castillo pitched well, but German Marquez gave up too many runs. Matt had only 2 hitters who stood out in round 1: former Nationals Trea Turner (37 points) and Kyle Schwarber (31.5 points). Beyond that, the offense was a mishmash of guys shuffling in and out of the lineup, with no one performing particularly well. Rhys Hoskins' injury didn't help, either.

6. The Rookies (Henry, 3569.83 points, last week 6): Henry's offense outperformed John's, so the blame for the first-round loss must be placed on The Rookies' vaunted rotation. Zack Wheeler, Tyler Mahle and Huascar Ynoa got hit hard and combined to go 0-6. Craig Kimbrel allowed 5 runs in 4.2 innings and went 0-1. Corbin Burnes picked up a win, but his strikeout rate tumbled. In all, Henry's pitchers totaled only 86 points in the 2-week period. Ouch. On the bright side, Tyler Naquin was an absolute monster at the plate. With 5 homers, 5 doubles, a triple and 10 singles, Naquin totaled 54 points! You're not going to cut him again, are you Henry? Ozzie Albies and Dansby Swanson mashed their way to 66 points combined, and unheralded Luis Urias and Elias Diaz scored 21 apiece.

I am the Edman (woo). They are the Edmen (woo). I am the walrus. Goo goo g'joob.

7. x-Clemente's Bucs (Ray, 3549.67 points, last week 8): We mentioned earlier that Ray's offense went nuts, and we weren't kidding. Check out these studly performers. Tommy Edman had 20 hits, drove in 11 and scored 52 points. Bryce Harper homered 4 times, drove in 10 and scored 44.5 points. Christian Yelich drove in 10 and scored 43 points. Pete Alonso homered 4 times, drove in 9 and scored 37 points. Ketel Marte added 36.5 points. Beyond that, you know it's your week when you pick up replacement-level Antonio Senzatela off the waiver wire for a double-start week, and he rewards you with 28 points -- including total domination of the Dodgers. Kyle Gibson added 34 points, which doesn't seem possible because you'd have thought the Philly bullpen would screw it all up for him.

8. Project Mayhem (Bill, 3442 points, last week 7): What a weird week for Bill's team. Come to think of it, it's kind of a weird roster. Semi-competent third baseman Austin Riley paced the field with 39 points, followed by catcher/outfielder (yes, really) Jorge Alfaro with 30. There's also a Rowdy Tellez, a Tommy La Stella, a Jason Heyward... (shrug). Zac Gallen is back from injury and was really good (32 points); so was Carlos Carrasco, but he didn't pick up a win because LOLMets. J.A. Happ was his usual, nondescript self, which was good for 24.67 points. Daniel Bard had the strangest performance of the 2-week period: He allowed 11 runs in 4.2 innings, went 2-2, blew 2 saves and picked up only 1 save.

Even that kid on the left is stunned that Alcides Escobar is back in the majors.

9. Arbitration Losers (Tim, 3384.83 points, last week 9): Meanwhile, in FBLG's version of the NIT basketball tournament, AL lost to JVC in the first of their 3 head-to-head battles. No one was particularly bad for Tim in round 1, but Mike Moustakas got hurt and Buster Posey didn't really do much. Starling Marte stole 9 bases and has been phenomenal for Oakland. Joey Votto somehow became one of the game's top power hitters, which doesn't make sense at his age (*cough, Ryan Braun, cough*). The pitching staff was decent but went 2-4.

10. Jon Voight's Car (Adam, 3241.5 points, last week 10): This certainly wasn't the offense Adam planned to run out there this season, but it was pretty darn good. Patrick Wisdom launched 7 homers and led the way with 42 points. Nick Castellanos hit 4 and was right on his tail with 41.5 points. And look! There's long-forgotten Alcides Escobar scoring 33 points off the scrap heap. Looks like you won't be needed around here, Francisco Lindor. Marcus Stroman picked up JVC's only pitching win, but the offense did enough that wins weren't important. Meanwhile, Alex Reyes had the "lite" version of Daniel Bard's week -- Reyes saved 2 games but blew 3 saves and went 0-2 while allowing 5 runs in 5.1 innings.